Ok.... so here is my problem.... I am too honest.
I am not willing to pretend and play the game. I make people feel uncomfortable because they don't want to confronted about the pretend game. They need to maintain the pretend game. For whatever reasons I am not terribly motivated by playing the pretend game.
It is not my intention, but speaking honestly offends people. Confronting the pretend game offends people. A part of me thinks that this type of confrontation is actually good for people and good for the world. However, it is definitely undesired.
Here is what I really don't understand. I am supposed to pretend because it makes other people feel better. Who decided that it is more right that the pretenders get to feel better in the moment than it is for me to speak honestly. What happened to the world that made it seem like I am being brash or harsh simply by speaking truth rather than playing some pretend game? Who decided that pretend was more important than being honest? Being an individual? Being willing to have a genuine perspective?
I am honest. I am not cruel. Giving honest feedback does not automatically equate with being a jerk!
Maybe I am getting old, but I am just really not willing to be who someone else tells me to be. I am particularly unwilling to take advice on who I should be from someone whom I do not respect or who is captain of the pretending team.
Please don't take this to mean that I am unwilling to take feedback or grow as a person. I have been on a journey of growth my whole life and hope to continue for the rest of my life. I just don't want to give up being me so that someone else can continue to live in the land of make believe. I guess if that makes me a bad person then so be it!
